Eulogy For LaNce

(This is Lyka Bergen's Eulogy for his Twin Brother LaNce)

-----O-----

I have known LaNce since gestation. We shared the same womb when we were still fist-sized. We enjoyed swimming together in Mom's water. The day of our birth, I was all ready to see the outside world but he was not. When those big hands pulled me out, LaNce was still stuck inside. He didnt want to come out. He was not ready to breathe on his own. He just wanted to be in his comfort zone.

This caused chaos in the delivery room. If LaNce stays there for long, it may lead to danger. Mom's heartbeat went tachy because of his refusal to go out. Dad and the doctors had decided to leave him inside and save Mom instead. Meaning, LaNce will never see the outside light ever. He'll die just for the OB Team to save Mom.

I decided to drag him out with me. I wanted him to be out. I'd never let go of his hand for four hours. Until he was out, crying.... gasping his first feel of independence. It was me who pulled him out saying "It's Ok, It's OK. Its beautiful out here". I thought he cried because he didn't get what he wanted and I cried too, just to let the world know that the next Roberta Flack has been born.

From then, LaNce and I were never separated. He's been a part of me ever since. Twins with totally different personalities, conjoined by Light.

I controlled most of our childhood. Our innocence ruled until society took part. We were both teased and bullied when we were young. Family, friends, classmates and neighbors took part. All because of me and my Wonder Woman fantasy.

We were both sexually molested as children. LaNce took it seriously and blamed it all on me. He decided that it would be him to take charge from then on. I concurred.

We were never happy. All those teen years we had together, LaNce was the boss. I was never in the picture at all. He would never let me. He was not proud of me. He thought it would be for the betterment of both of us. Until Cupid made a solution one day.

LaNce fell for this guy but LaNce was so pessimistic that he never tried to pursue him. It was all me who made the move because I knew then the guy liked him too. (LaNce would never see that, unless the guy tells him he likes him up-front. That is how LaNce was).

The problem was, I fell for the same guy too. And the guy loved us both. He would never settle just for one. He liked LaNce for his looks and Me for my personality. Since we really both liked the guy, we agreed to share him. For seven years, the three of us were lovers.

This 7 years is when LaNce decided for me to have a say in how we should live our lives together. (I thought it was because he wanted to keep the guy, but it was something more than this). He started to introduce me to his friends. His friends who accepted me and loved me. Friends, that LaNce thought will forsake him because of me. LaNce became more happy. This is when my twin bro confirmed that I am truly part of him. That he cannot deny me. He told me:

"You are not that bad as I thought! I feel better when I have you beside me. My friends love you. You make me as cool as Johnny Depp in Edward Scissorhands!"

From then, LaNce and I lived in harmony. I was his Yin and he was my Yang. He would listen to me and I would listen to him. But we were never the boss at the same time. LaNce was the good one and I was the bad one. On those days that we both need to be subtle, he would rule me like a dictator. But when we both need to be bitches for some reason, I would always be the one to be followed.

LaNce, who always wanted to be in his comfort zone, would have never been happy without me. And without LaNce.... I would surely be a mess.

I'm a mess now, my twin brother. Now that you're gone. I will miss you so much. I would never function as me alone without you. And I know that you will never rest in peace without me. Wait for me. I will see you tomorrow!

------O------

Etchos! Ka-etchosan ni Kiks ang lahat na toh! In reality, this will never happen because when LaNce dies, Lyka dies too. Kasi nga, we are one. Tse!