Monday, April 4, 2011

Learning to Walk

Earrings: secondhand, $3 from thrift store
Gingham shirt: Old Navy, $19
Blouse: Macy's, $15
Sweater: ModCloth, $17
Jeggings: gift from my mom
Boots: gift from my mom

These are not the most conventional outfit photos for me, but I swear there's a good reason for it. All will become clear in time.

On Friday/Saturday, I became inexplicably depressed, and nobody likes to dress up and take pictures in the front yard while depressed (which explains why I haven't done outfit posts in a few days). All a depressed person wants to do is lie somewhat uncomfortably on a couch in his/her pajamas, stewing about what a pathetic, talentless, smelly human being he/she is. This is all part of being depressed, in my experience, and it is no fun at all.

These depression spells seem to come along every three months or so. For the record, I know what it's like to be depressed in an "I'm suffering from depression" kind of way, and that is not what's going on for me with these bouts. Still, it's a destructive and difficult habit, and I keep trying to find ways to either solve the pattern or accept it, whichever is most right.

As a teenager, I was very aware that other girls my age were sometimes filled with self-doubt or self-loathing, maybe because of how they looked or how people treated them, and I remember being so grateful at the time that, for whatever reason, I wasn't afflicted with such issues. Actually, I thought I was pretty special because of it. Such flawed, flawed logic ... But anyway, turns out that I was just saving some of these confidence/personal criticism issues for adulthood. FUN! And now I have to deal with them.

I don't bring all of this up in an effort to get sympathy or encouragement via the internet; luckily, I have sufficient amounts of both from my real-life support system (have I ever told you that I have the best best friend and the best husband in all the land?). The part I really wanted to share is that, between reading some heavy-duty inspirational quotes and listening to some wise advice from my husband, I think the solution to this problem will be to find and follow a new passion (or four).

One really mild passion that I took some time with today: taking a walk. I looped my point-and-shoot camera around my right wrist and took pictures whilst walking, most of them very haphazard. I took that same not-really-trying approach to the above outfit pictures, actually. Here were my favorite shots from the day.


Maybe going for a walk around the neighborhood doesn't sound like a legit "passion," or at least not a worthwhile one, but whatevs. It makes me happy.

The other things I'm doing are:
1. learning to play chess (Craig and I are halfway through my first game ever)
2. getting back to my doula training (I was super wrapped-up in this about a year ago)
3. working on altered books (check it out -- I'm already getting started!)


Anyhoo, I think you can expect to see some documentation of these new hobbies, which will mean pictures that look a little different. Heads up.

And also: this is the fifth day of my Weeklong Remix with the gingham shirt. I've worn the shirt more days than I've documented it, but I figured I ought to share these pictures from today just to officially round out the five-day stretch.

Gingham Shirt Remix #5:

See also:
Gingham Shirt Remix #1
Gingham Shirt Remix #2
Gingham Shirt Remix #3
Gingham Shirt Remix #4

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