Love Reflex

"Mahal mo ba ako dahil kailangan mo ako or Kailangan mo ako dahil mahal mo ako?"

Was that Claudine's remarks in that forgettable movie? How beautiful naman the matter. It is so me at this point. So I ask the doubt myself.

Mr Mahal Kita Dahil Kailangan Kita:

He's so persistent. He will always say he loves me but it doesnt stop there. After the "I Love You's" there is this "I need help". The help he's asking is more of the financial side. And that is so no-no talaga sa isang relationship for me ha. Once/Twice and if in dire is fine with me, but... Often? So chaka and so palpak. I hate it. So bye bye mister. I dont need this kind of love.

Mr Kailangan Kita Dahil Mahal Kita:

So came this guy. Nice looking. Professional. And doesnt need to ask me some financial favors. I thought this might be it. But this one is so clingy ha. He needs me because he loves me. He needs me to see/call him everyday. To chat with him everyday. He needs his 'good mornings' and 'good nights' from me.... and mind you, that's all his asking raw ha. And to think, di pa kami officially mag jowa nyan ha. He gets mad if i dont act like the way he does (like being sweet to the point na lalangamin ka na). As if, im the only person that gives him life talaga. Well, that is so OA for me ha. and I dont do that. So i took a break and never came back.

----O----

A friend would ask: "Bakit wala ka pang BF? Maarte ka kasi!". Call me maarte pero di ko talaga ma take. Well, there are this kind of Pinoy Baklas that "Provides for Love". Im not one of them. And there are those who "Over-acts when in love". Hinde rin ako dyan na belong.

Im just a bakla looking for a Love Reflex. A spontaneous display of affection. Unforced. Extemporaneous. Unstudied. Walang effort. Mentioning this, i dont wanna look for it. It will just come uninhibited. Maybe, that is why i dont have someone at this point. Is my Love process too complicated? Pls lang!