Thursday, May 31, 2007

LTE Awards: May 2007 Nominees

Nasa kay Miss Japan na ang Mikimoto. Wala nang mag-reklamo! Move on na! LTE (Titi) Awards na naman tayo. It's time for I.E. (April Titi Winner) to pass the crown. Sino kaya sa Top 10 nating ito ang tatanghaling Riyo Mori of the the Month of May?

Mga Desperadang Asawa, announce nyo na ang nominees nating for this month... please!

Susan: Excited na ba kayo? Gusto nyo na bang malaman kung sino-sino ang pasok sa Top 10?" ...... Gabrielle: Bilisan mo naman, Susan at ihing-ihi na ketch!.... Bree: Oh sha, sha, nagmamadali na ang bruha!... Lynette: Eto na! Eto na! At ako'y excited na!.... Edie: Lecheng buhay naman to Oo. Pati dito extra lang ang role koh! Asan na ba ang envelope at ako ang mag-announce ng unang bakla sa listahan....

Edie: Here we go, In random order. Lets begin with....... Jase!

JASE in 1 Out Of 10

"Actually, I love men who hide their sexuality... there is that hint of mystery... and you want to find or untangle the unknown! Very challenging... exciting!"

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Susan: Lets welcome... The Aceist!

The ACEIST in Blond Or Brunet?

(On choosing between Traveler's Tyler(Blond) and Jay(Brunet) "Feel ko pinag-aawayan na nila ako. With matching suicidal effect pa si Blondie 'pagdi ko pinagbigyan. Pwes magpakamatay na siya. Kay Brunette ako".

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Gabrielle: You better kick ass... Kiks!

KIKS in A Song For Ekra

(On long lost true love) "It's like looking for him in faces of people you meet. Trying to figure out his voice in a noisy crowd. Feeling the warmth of his skin on those your arms accidentally brushed with or intentionally hugged. Exacting that love you once had with those who came right thereafter.

Years pass. One's sight blurs. his hearing clogs. His senses numb. But the feeling remains as strongly as it did the first time. It sounds crazy. It is crazy. But it is true love".

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Bree: You can now breathe... Bitterbitch!

BITTER BITCH in A Song For Ekra

(On long lost true love pa rin) ".....Kailangan tanggapin na wala ng bukas para sa inyo kundi kahapon. Kahapon na puno ng mga mapait at matamis din namang alaala na maari mo na lamang balikan sa iyong panaginip... Hay...Pag-ibig nga naman!"

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Lynette: To complete the First half is.... Maruja!

EMPRESS MARUJA in Brokeback Mountain Issue

(On a certain girl's case suing her teacher for showing the film in their class). "Kahit ano naman yata puwede mong ikaso sa Amerika. Madulas ka lang, kasalanan ng gobyerno. Namatay ang tuta mo sa microwave, kasalanan ng kumpanya".

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Edie: C'Mon down and fly kiss... Mrs. J!

MRS. J in Brokeback Mountain Issue

(On the same case) "Hay... everytime nalang na homo related ang issue people make a big deal out of it.. nakakalungkot lang tuloy kasi come to think of it,... ISSUE pa bang matatawag ang pagiging bakla?! Puhleezz.. Eh kahit san kana ngalang tumingin e may bakla?!"

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Susan: You all guessed it right.... Maui!

MAUI in Papa: Eugen Bauder

(On Eugen Bauder's sexy pictures) "Sa sobrang galit ng abs nya, natakot yung titi nya!!!!!!!! Umurong?!!"

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Gabrielle: Why dont you bring your butt down here... Aries!

ARIES in Wildlife Telenovela

(On YouTube's amateur wildlife clip) "It's so amazing how nature reminds us how a community and a family is important to an individual. being a member of one would contribute to each others safety, education and survival. salamat sa gay cammunity! we will survive! Charing!"

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Bree: I knew it! I knew it!.... Bananas!

BANANAS in Wildlife Telenovela

(On the same video clip) "This classically tells us that the world out there is cruel and that is a given that we must accept, no matter how uncomfortable this truth is. Someone bites us and the best thing to do is to bite back. Part of our flesh is ripped-off, we rip the entire ripper's whole body, including the soul.

But the vid also reminds us about the law of nature. It's part of the prey-predator thing. It's normal no matter how insane it appears to us. But who says being normal is not being insane, tho?"

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Lynette: Only one more bakla has the chance to become our May Titi Winner and she is.... Johnny Panic!

Johnny Panic in Mikimoto, Japan!

(On former Miss Universe Zuleyka's unhappy face while crowning Miss Japan as the new Miss Universe) "Dapat si Zuleyka ang nadapa. Strike two na sya ha!!! She deserved that angry mob more than anyone on stage. Hinampas sana ni Miss Japan ang industrial strength bouquet nya sa retokadang mukha ng Zuleyka..... Walk-out!"

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Bree: There we go! Our Top 10 Bakla and our nominees for May Titi Award... Lynette: The winner will be chosen by votes. Vote for your top 3 choice in this post's comment section... Edie: Total votes will be added to the LTE's votes. The one with highest score wins (Naman!).... Susan: In 5 days, the winner will be announced.... Gabrielle: So, Good Luck ladies at Ihing-ihi na ako. Good Night!

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